Healthy Empowered Mama

Seemingly simple question...

What can you do today that you couldn't do 12 months ago?

But for me...it was a loaded question. Happily loaded!

I have been thinking a lot recently, about where I was this time a year ago. 

Last year, on December 22nd, Declan and I moved into our condo. I had searched for 4 months while staying at my moms, to find a place that we could call our OWN and make a home...

Since we moved in night before Christmas...it was a mess. I vividly remember...hardly any furniture, a bed frame with a mattress waiting to be delivered, boxes stacked sky high from wall to wall and a pack and play set up so I had one safe place to put him. The walls were bare, the fridge was empty (shocker...as much as I love to cook), my TO DO list was 700 pages long and nothing seemed "homey" about it. Except, we had each other, we had love, and NOW we had a home, to call our very own. 

I called to turn on the power and the gas...and turned out there was something wrong with the pilot, so, for the next 4 days we had no hot water, no dishwasher...the simple things we take for granted. (I boiled water on the stove to pour into his bath tub...problem solved.) But, it didn't matter to me...he was taking a bath in his OWN tub! 

I sought out my Christmas boxes and put up a tree, amidst all the chaos. I loved looking at the sparkling lights, and a little ducky ornament I bought for Declan, thinking...this was Declan's FIRST Christmas. Although I was not where I wanted to be, I wanted to remember that that was the year I promised myself, I would never take the little blessings for granted.  We had each other, we were safe. 

For a few days, it seemed fun...let's think how to decorate, what I need to buy, ohhhh... the things we will do!

Then, it dawned on me...it wasn't so much about what the place looked like, or where it was or even how big it was...it was all about what went on inside those doors. It was about, what I would create for us. 

I had to teach myself, not to think about things too much, to get caught up in the never ending expectations I was setting for myself...to just DO them. I realized by dwelling on all of those things, I was getting stuck. I knew I wanted to create the life I dreamed of for us...

And, it began....

Day by day. One painting up on the wall, one book put on a shelf, his clothes put away in drawers...

One box at a time. 

One more little piece to it becoming our own. 

It was liberating. 

So liberating. And I began to love it. I stopped looking at all the challenges as a feat I couldn't win, and started looking at each new thing as an opportunity to learn about myself, and learn what I was really made of. 

Then, not long after...Beachbody came into my life. It was my safe haven. My positive, uplifting community, my opportunity to do something I was passionate about and to be able to give to others,  and be able to provide for us the way I wanted.

And the rest is history...really. I can't and haven't stopped yet, and don't plan on it anytime soon.

There is still many missing puzzle pieces, but I see now, that life unfolds beautifully in its own timing...teaching us along the way.

Which brings me full circle to a question my dear friend Leslie posted a week ago, and stopped me in my tracks-- What can you do today that you couldn't do 12 months ago?

I can be grateful...insanely grateful.

I proudly provide a solid, stable, loving home and environment for Declan, that he can thrive in. 

I can give Declan 100% everyday, because I have chosen to make myself a priority. 

I can be a good mom, without thinking I need to be superwoman.

I  can be a coach to many and teach others my passion for a healthy, happy, empowered life. 

I can lead a team of amazing people to realize they are capable of creating their dreams and show them how, by helping others.

I can write a blog.

 I can create and share my passion for healthy cooking. 

I can take on any workout, because I am now physically strong enough.

I can read personal development everyday, that helps me continue to gain strength in areas that I feel I lack.

 I can be positive, and find the good in any situation. 

I can be OPEN and HONEST about where I have been, where I am, and where I want to go...with NO shame (this one is HUGE).
I can be humble. I can be resilient.
I can share my struggles to inspire others.
I can admit I am NOT perfect.
I can realize that harmful things others do, speak multitudes about them, not us.
I can take comfort in the fact that my decisions are made whole heartedly with the right intent. 

I can take pride in the fact that I am a single mom and what I have built for us...and what I am continuously creating for us.
I can be present.

I can be a great listener. 

I can help others solve problems. 

I can ask for help (silly, but I really struggled with this one.)

I can take a little time for myself to do things I love, like painting, without feeling guilty. 

I can acknowledge that I am worth it.

I can love others, without complete and utter fear. 

I can trust.
I can overcome whatever life throws me.
I can turn past pain, into purpose.

And, I can choose to see the world any which way I want...

I KNOW who I am...

I know where I am going...

I know where I want to be a year from now...

I can GIVE. 

I can CREATE.

I can DREAM.

I can empower and be empowered.

I can accomplish so much more than I ever knew I could. 

So, ask yourself...what can you do now, that you couldn't last year? 

And more importantly...what do you want to be able to do next year, that you can't right now? Dream big.